Finding confidence, freedom, and joy in your stitches
If you’ve ever been told…
- “You crochet weird.”
- “That’s not the right way.”
- “I can’t follow you—you’re doing it wrong.”
…then this post is for you.
Because I’ve heard those same words too.
And if I’m being honest? The first feeling is a quick flash of anger.
But right after that… it turns into something else.
Sadness.
Not for me—but for the beginner sitting on the other side of the screen, quietly wondering if they’re doing everything wrong… and maybe thinking about quitting.
And that’s something I will never be okay with.
Let Me Say This Clearly: There Is Not Just One Right Way to Crochet
There is a right outcome in crochet.
But there is not just one right way to get there.
And that distinction matters more than most people realize.
Here’s what I believe with my whole heart:
The right way to crochet is to create the correct stitch structure—but how you get there is personal.
That means:
- How you hold your hook ✔
- How you wrap your yarn ✔
- How you tension your yarn ✔
- Whether your yarn goes over or under ✔
These things are deeply personal.
They are shaped by:
- Your hands
- Your comfort
- Your coordination
- Your experience
- Even how you were first taught (or not taught)
And that’s exactly what makes crochet… handmade.
Why This Conversation Matters (Especially for Beginners)
Most of my audience is:
- Beginners
- Self-taught crocheters
- Women who didn’t grow up with someone showing them the ropes
And I want to say something directly to you:
You are not behind. You are not wrong. You are learning.
When someone tells you there’s only one “correct” way to crochet, it can feel intimidating.
It can make you second-guess every stitch.
It can steal the joy right out of your hands.
And too often…
👉 It makes people quit.
That’s the part that breaks my heart.
Because crochet should feel:
- Peaceful
- Creative
- Satisfying
- Encouraging
Not stressful. Not rigid. Not like you’re being graded.
The Truth About Technique: Personal, Not Prescriptive
Let’s talk about one of the biggest debates in crochet:
Yarn Over vs Yarn Under
You’ve probably seen it.
Some crocheters wrap their yarn one way…
Others do it differently.
And then the comments come:
- “That’s not right.”
- “You’re doing it backwards.”
- “You need to fix that.”
But here’s the truth:
In many cases, both methods can produce the same stitch structure.
If your stitch:
- Has the correct loops
- Matches the intended design
- Looks consistent across your work
👉 Then you are achieving the correct result.
Now—does that mean anything goes?
No.
There are moments where technique matters more (we’ll talk about that next).
But in many everyday stitches, the path you take to get there can vary.
And that’s okay.
Actually…
That’s beautiful.
Where Precision DOES Matter (And Why It’s Important)
Now let’s bring balance into this conversation.
Because while crochet is personal…
👉 It is also a craft with structure.
And there are non-negotiables.
1. Gauge Matters
If a pattern calls for a specific gauge, it’s not a suggestion.
It affects:
- Fit
- Size
- Drape
- Overall success of the project
You can crochet in your own style—but your gauge must match the pattern.
2. Stitch Count Matters
Missing or adding stitches will change:
- Shape
- Alignment
- Final outcome
Freedom in technique does not mean freedom in counting.
3. Construction Matters
Patterns are built intentionally.
Things like:
- Where increases happen
- How pieces are joined
- The order of steps
👉 These are not optional.
4. Stitch Structure Matters
Even if your yarn movement is different…
The final stitch must still be:
- Recognizable
- Functional
- Consistent
So What Does This Mean?
Bring your personal hand to the process—but respect the structure of the pattern.
That’s the balance.
That’s the art.
The Essence of Handmade
Here’s something I want you to really sit with:
If every crocheter worked exactly the same way… handmade wouldn’t exist.
It would just be manufacturing.
The small differences in how we:
- Hold our hook
- Move our hands
- Tension our yarn
👉 That’s what gives crochet its soul.
Your stitches carry you in them.
And no one else can replicate that exactly.
Let’s Talk About “Persnickity Crocheters”
You’ve probably encountered them.
I call them persnickity crocheters.
They are the ones who:
- Need to be right
- Point out “faults” constantly
- Correct without encouraging
- Prioritize rules over people
And I want to be very clear about something:
That is not the kind of community I am building here.
I believe in:
- Encouragement over criticism
- Teaching over shaming
- Growth over perfection
Because here’s the truth:
When someone feels safe…
👉 They improve faster.
👉 They stay longer.
👉 They enjoy the process.
And that’s what matters.
A Gentle Faith Reminder (For the Heart)
If you’re someone who walks in faith, let me offer you this quiet encouragement:
“Let everything you do be done in love.” — 1 Corinthians 16:14
Even in crochet.
Especially in crochet.
We are not here to:
- Tear down
- Prove superiority
- Create fear
We are here to:
- Build up
- Encourage
- Create with joy
And that includes how we speak to one another—even in something as simple as yarn and a hook.
What I Want You to Walk Away With
If you remember nothing else from this post, remember this:
1. If your stitches look right, you’re doing it right
The end result matters more than the exact motion.
2. Consistency matters more than method
Pick what works for you—and stay consistent.
3. Crochet should feel peaceful, not stressful
If it feels heavy, something needs to change.
4. Your way is not “wrong”—it’s yours
And that matters.
5. You are allowed to learn without fear
You don’t need permission to grow.
To the Beginner Who Feels Unsure…
If you’ve ever sat there thinking:
- “Am I doing this wrong?”
- “Why does mine look different?”
- “Maybe I’m just not good at this…”
Let me say this to you, clearly:
You are doing better than you think.
Every crocheter you admire once:
- Held the hook awkwardly
- Struggled with tension
- Frogged projects over and over
They didn’t quit.
And neither should you.
A Final Thought (From Me to You)
Crochet is not just a skill.
It’s:
- A rhythm
- A comfort
- A quiet place
- A form of expression
And there is room in it for you—exactly as you are.
So no…
There is not just one right way to crochet.
But there is a right way to approach it:
With patience. With grace. And with joy.
Reflective Note
I believe that the most beautiful things are not made by perfection—but by persistence.
So pick up your hook.
Wrap your yarn the way that feels natural.
And keep going.
Because your stitches?
They are already telling a story worth finishing.